All this time I thought it was her fault. It wasn't, it was mine.
Nobody reads this journal anymore, none of the friends on the list are active, most have been gone for years. I thought it prudent though to make the confession here, on the journal that was prominent at the beginning of our relationship.
I was wrong, it took a few therapy/counseling sessions and long walks with God in the forest to shed light on something I was completely blind to. So, so blind. I marvel at really how blind I was, a willful denial of the reality around me. As my relationship grows with God, to a deeper level than I have ever experienced, He is peeling back the layers; one painful realization after another.
I was wrong. It wasn't her, it was me.